Stressed yet chilled and relaxed

Over the past week I have been feeling stressed of things in life. I’ve been struggling with money and going over all my accounts, whats coming in and going out and removing anything I can right away to reduce my outgoings. That is one of the many things that have been on my mind. Others include my work to do in my 3 or so jobs, and ensuring enough time is dedicated to each and every one of them.

However on Saturday morning I woke up and felt a peace, a peace I’ve not felt in a while. I am still aware of all that I need to do and get sorted yet at the same time feel everything is going to be okay. A calmness has filled me and all I can say is that it feels quite wierd. My mind seems split, one side is hectic, thinking about everything thats needing to be done and other other is calm, telling me everything is okay and it is being sorted.

Have you ever felt when you walk into a room that you know that people you know are also there. You don’t know who exactly, just that they are there. When I say that to friends I am with, an reply sometimes is “I’m not suprised some people think your wierd with comments like that” – is it normal? I’ve been a few times to the cinema and felt a presence of people I know are there but I can not see them… then a few days later, or online they come to me and say they saw me, and did i enjoy the film… It happens at all different things – I’m guessing it doesn’t happen to everyone.

I love looking at the moon when its full. I get a giddy feeling inside whenever I see it, I was never sure why but think its because I’ve linked the image to my dreams. Many years ago, I worked out how to put a concious thought into my subconcious mind so that I may take control of my dreams. I used a full moon with dark clouds surrounding it with a blue glow surrounding the moon. Something that even in sunlight would not be seen normally.

When I see my chosen image (full moon glowing), I get a choice within my dream to allow it to continue and run out or take control and break the rules of normality – I often choose to fly… to lift myself up into the air and move around with just the thought of direction. I can choose to change the dynamics of everything around me and once in place, choose to continue control or let it run or a mixture of both that usually happens.

Lucid Dreams of Sorts

For a while now, I’ve been able to do lucid dreaming – the ability to conciously take control of aspects within an unconcious state (dreaming) and change/modify to my liking – the realisation that your dreaming and most of the time taking control of the situations. Its something I love to do, and often feel more rested the next day. It allows me to work through issues, problems, and sometimes play out a situation – to see how it could possably happen.

One of the main things I seem to do, is fly – I love the freedom of being able to move up and cover vast distances with the thought of moving oneself through the air. Its strange that I usually only give the ability to myself, and not the many others around me. Many times its out of fear – trying to get away from something then realising that its a dream and knowing I can get away but what funner way of doing so than flying out of reach and zooming away or to something or someone.

I would encourage people to learn lucid dreaming, or developing the abilty to do so. Its not something I can do every night, or whenever I sleep and its something that seems to happen in cycles. For weeks I’ll be unable to even remember dreams then a week where I can control what could happen. I’ve seen many places on how I may do this whole idea of lucid dreaming and taking control but not totally sure how I learned it myself.

I seem to continue some dreams over many nights, often in a row – These are not always ones I control, but are often adventures that in the time of sleep seem to cover many weeks, to months in a night. To live a life of someone else in a week and then it changes and something else happens. But months, maybe years later it continues and I can remember all of the past and often realise its a memory from a dream and that I must be in a dream so I try changing things with thought… and things change and again I am in the controlling phase again.

Why not try it? It can be fun

Not so great…

This afternoon I’ve not felt too brilliant. I was very tired and felt slugish, no mental or body energy for a while so laid down and went to sleep.

I remember dreaming but it wasn’t nice. Over the past few nights it hasn’t been too nice. There seems to be a negative feeling over them all.

From being hurt in some way and feeing the pains while awakening before realising I’m awake and it passing to the feelings that something was trying to get rid of me. I don’t know why but I don’t like it.

I feel very hot, and can not seem to cool down quickly then suddenly the oposite – really cold unable to warm up. Is it normal? I usually dream nice things, or only seem to remember the nice things anyway. This side I don’t like…

I want to return to my adventures but maybe there is something I need to do – But I need to remember what that something is or to work it out, I hope I work it out soon.

Dreamland – Fun yet dangerous with the occasional kickback (pt2/2)

View Part 1 of the dream

The street theater – There was circus like acts going on, people up high on wierd bikes or stilts in bright costumes. There was something everywhere most of the time unless you went out into the fields that just seemed to go on forever. You chose the weather by thinking it and it happened – be it Rain, glorious sunshine, or snow.

We went out in the snow and built snow people, it was snow and we just seemed to have the warm clothes to wear, there was clothes racks all over and you just grabbed what you wanted. It wasn’t cold but just right and it was so easy to make things… everything we wanted just seemed to be lying around. There was snow ball fights getting us all drenched and covered and wandered over to a pond that was frozen over – we went ice skating, and chilled out just having fun.

I recall thinking, “is this all a dream?” and tried to float but couldn’t. Usually if I work out its a dream I can float or fly and continue. The rain was lovely at night, such a relaxing sound it bouncing off the glass windows.

There was play parks big enough for adults with huge slides, and swings that you could get really high on – not recommended to jump from althou we did and recall it hurting but just for a couple of seconds before going back and playing some more. There was climbing frames, and a few zip lines over water and this wierd spongy foam that seemed to take quite an impact and not hurt when you hit it.

Food was awesome, there seemed to be a place for everything – I recall a place that served just loads of different crisps and a dance floor for salsa – it was great. You could watch or join in. I could seem to remember all the moves from classes in my real life inside the dream and actually be able to do them and enjoy it. The food was eat as much or little as you want.

There was trampolines about the size of 4 normal club sized ones put together – you could get really high and catapult yourself all over or mix with friends and play amazing games of seat attack catapulting one another into the air.

It didn’t feel like you were in danger unless you went down the bank through the shopping centre, everywhere else seemed safe and the people around us were happy too. Only at one point when we were heading down past the centre did we need to stop the group and re-direct them – they were heading towards the unpleasent place but they couldn’t seem to feel it – a strange sense I seemed to have.

Days seemed to pass into weeks yet I was only asleep a few hours, I awoke feeling refreshed but suprised I was at home. I have no idea how I got there, or how I returned but look forward to going there again like so many of my past dreams – they somehow reconnect and its like a continuation.

• Coming Soon: Dreams Blog

Dreamland – Fun yet dangerous with the occasional kickback (pt1/2)

There was what seemed to be a town, like a giant themepark – everywhere there was something to do: be it a show or event somewhere, a ride to go on, a stall to play at or a place to eat at aswell as street theater all around me.

Down one road it felt very dark, it went into a shopping centre with all grey closed shutters and down a hill. At the top of the hill there was an open market stall with veg, and fruit and a girl behind the counter serving and looking oddly towards me when I started to head down the hill. I felt uncomfortable and it was as thou you were diving into an unknown danger – I headed back up and into the central area – the whole atmostphere felt better and happier again.

There was a lot of shows on, for almost anything imagined I recall but don’t remember what they were – just remember that everything seemed covered in some way or uncovered in many ways. You had the choice to be an audience member or actually get up and have a go at anything. It was fun, scary, entertaining and rewarding.

There were loads of people around me, they seemed familure but at the same time unknown to me. I made friends with a few of them and we wandered around the place together.

There was an area to design your own rollercoaster and then ride it with friends, so many high sudden turns that surely were unsafe and unlikely to ever happen in the real world. It was something you designed and said you’d like and then come back and ride – kind of like waiting for a picture to be developed.

Time – it wasn’t just a few hours, it was more like around a few weeks or so had passed with the time there – even recall going to sleep and getting up and right back into the action. We often crashed out in different places after a nights entertainment.

One afternoon there was an attack… some people were running around and we originally thought it was a scene from a theater piece to find out suddenly it wasn’t as the people came towards us. They were covered with blood, cuts all over and dragging others down with them.

We ran but some people came after us with knives and we ran fast and got split up. We went up & down steps, over fences/walls and through a maze of buildings.. we looked back they seemed to be gone we kept on going and returned to the centre again to meet up again.

Continues Tommorrow

• Coming Soon: Dreams Blog

A Dream – Its all OK

Last nights dream was interesting, I recall being out with people and seeing a friend thats been ill in hospital. I’ve not heard how they have been doing althou enquire every other day. But it felt like a sign, that they are reaching out and saying its all going to be okay – I know that I pray that they are.

I awoke with words in mind, not just once but twice – in my dream I woke and wrote it down, and then re-awoke realising that I’d not actually wrote it down.. maybe it was to remind me to remember – somethings need to be said multiple times to make you realise.

When we grow up
we are all just still kids
but then in adult suits looking around

We are all multiple – not just one
He is a father, and yet a child
She is a mother, and a nurse
We are all someone, and something else

Maybe it means something, it brought a kind of peace over me and althou looking at it now seems confusing – I know that it made perfect sense.

Dream Alternative Reality – Part 1

What if the dream world was not just a dream but a possable alternative reality where the memories of here and now are mixed and able to be displayed and acted out in another place.

A strange dream is what I had or moved to an alternative reality for a few hours – in this place only 35 minutes passed – in the other days had passed.

While out with friends I was in a park, we were playing games outdoor – something we’d not done for years. It was so relaxing to get away from the work world and be with friends and just chill out.

Games like hide and seek, frizbee, tag, stuck in the mud, rounders, football – just a mixture of active games that we used to play as kids but never now relax and do anymore.

I feel so energised and was running around in a field and was suddenly walking down a street where everything had changed. Things around me looked very old but new at the same time. The style had been dated but seemed to be built that way.

I had fell into what seemed to be the past and for some reason I was in blackpool. I wasn’t there before so it was very odd. I don’t know if it was exactly as it should be.

I was watching the many people walking places, playing by the sea and talking to each other. The occasional arguments but generally a peace with kids playing in streets and calm weather.

One person invited me in, saying I looked lost and gave me some food and drink. They said I had a strange accent and they’d not seen me around. I felt relaxed and welcome and accepted the food and drink – it was tasty althou the water tasted a little funny.

I asked the date as people do, and they told me 19th April 1959 – I was suprised by the year as I was in 2009 earlier that day. The shock promted them to ask me more but I couldn’t share that – they’d think I was crazy.

I met with other people around the same age as me and younger – they were quite active, I remember asking one person lots of details to write here when I got back. If the young lady of 1959 in the shop by the side reads this, please get in touch – it wasn’t just a dream.

I wonder if they read this now in this date, I wonder if they kept the note – I said in 50 years checkout the internet and go to this address, I said to remember and lock it away til now – Who knows the alternative reality could truely be real and not just imagination

The dream feels like a series – a connection to somewhere else so maybe I’ll have a lot more to say. So for now…. End of Part 1

Dream Control

Ever wanted to be the director of your dreams? I have wanted to take control lots of times. To wonder if I can change the situation and remembering when I woke up that I wanted to change it but couldn’t.

I couldn’t change it then because I didn’t realise it was a dream. To actualy work out while asleep that I am asleep and the reality that while in my mind I can change the events that are happening – to re-shape the reality – That is an interesting dream/idea in itself.

I learned a long time ago that in dreams I could take control. I could change the physics of the world. Films like “The Matrix” reminded me of my dreams where I could fly when I wanted or stop something from happening.

I will tell you a way how I managed to remind myself I was in a dream but for you to take control and change the reality is all up to you. Its what I’ve used so far that I will explain – It may work for you – it may not but here goes:

1. Find a picture thats kinda normal with a distinctive marking. An example could be a Moon with a large smiley face on it.

2. Set an quite small alarm [like a beeper] for 2 hours into sleep – so if you in bed at 11, set for 1am.

3. Keep Photo/picture by alarm for you to turn off an look at.

4. Do this for around 10 consecutive days.

5. For the next 5 days, continue to set the alarm and switch off [Keep the photo if you want but you should remember it by now]

Your mind should be programmed subliminally now that 2 hours into sleep something will happen. You may initially wake up to turn alarm off or all going to plan you will see the image within your dream and realise as your mind has started to awaken that you are in a dream still and try and change things.

I’m not saying it will work, just that it seems to work for me. Enjoy!

A time of Nothingness or Everything

Walking into my room, looking through the darkness and seeing a window. The curtains open and the outside gray. No colour, no light just gray – a nothingness.

Am I dreaming while I look or seeing something that seems like life. A time where so much can happen and yet can not distinguish what I am seeing in the future posabilities.

Is there so many that its all one mesh or so little that things are picked at and the gray is just dust.

Recently I’ve been unwell, lack of energy, headaches, light sensativity aswell as many other things. Its just life – we all get ill. Its annoying – I can see all these things I want to do and can not do them – just writing a list to work through when better.

I see it all but its just a confusing pile of future – so many posabilities. Whats next?

Hidden Light, Darkness Prevails.

In my dream I saw a lot of friends from past times, getting on a stage with a group I recognised from church events. They started to dance, many were doing trance dance moves in motion with the music and beat that came on.

We were in a big hall, lots of people and myself – the hall was on a slant, getting steeper the further back you went. At first I kept falling forward until I got my grip.

After some time the slant was gone and we were all just watching, in a kind of silence where we could hear what was happening on stage but everything else was silent.

We watched and the dancing continued. It seemed amazing, then the stage lights went off… the music continued althou a lot quieter, and a voice came on asking the audience what was happening, could we still see the dance, could we still see the joy and happyness – we couldn’t.

We couldn’t see because we no longer saw the light, no-one was allowing us to see what was happening. We were blinded from what we could have and could get – If felt so wrong and that we were cheated, all because we couldn’t see with the darkness.

It got me thinking within the dream and now in the real world that we all have the choice for Joy and happyness if we have a light shining in our lives. But so often we cover it with reasons of why not to show it.

Its still a part of us, and makes us amazingly happy and when people do see it they often get happy too and want to see and have it for themselves but instead we either want it just for us or dont want to be embarrased – don’t want to be singled out, or riddiculed.

We are so ready to get hurt we never see what benefit it could be to others and how it could so amazingly shine through them.

So I say, “Let your light shine, and don’t cover it up” – You could multiply it so many many others can also be in joy and happyness too.