Diary – The blog area

Life Updates

Posted on by JC

Whats been happening in life, well it seems not much at first glance and the same answer I give to people asking “What have you been up too”. I work, I play, dance and enjoy. But in reality, quite a lot.

I’ve been focusing more on what I can do. How I can expand my knowledge and abilities. In dancing, I’m learning to salsa weekly now aswell as following learning things online using videos and stuff. Video is useful as can rewind and replay, but class is great as can be shown close up what and if I go wrong. All is fun.

On the computer, I am learning Adobe products & doing courses using distance learning. I’ve always wanted to learn photoshop & Flash and now I am slowly. The course will take something like 9 months but found other resources like adobe tv and seminars that adobe do on tuesdays and thursdays.

In other news I’ve had a meeting with business link on how i can adapt to take over the family business and how I can run it all from business management & staffing to finances and marketting.

Aswell as business link, i’ve met with people from the North East Chamber of Commerce (NECC) on how to get funding, do networking & training. Its a lot to take in but I’m getting more excited and interested the more I hear.

At trampolining I’ve started on sumasaults, I can get around and onto my feet in the rig but otherwise I kinda go splatt but its a start. I am also getting the chance to help others in trampolining – my assistant coaching qualification coming to use. Its amazing when people learn something you’ve taught them. Its better than payment in reality.

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Creatures of the house

Posted on by JC

How many of us have found food we thought we had we have no more and not because we ate it… but something else had.

I’ve been sorting through my cuboards, clearing out old stuff. I found I had products in there that we dated early 2003 which is odd considering I moved in here in late 2005 so that was nice to discover.

I cleared the shelves and it all seemed good and then got to the bottom shelf where things were not so good anymore… Where a lot of my herbs, and Teas are kept and a lot of snack products like rivita, and other dried breads and crackers….

Seems the should have been kept in glass as something had eaten its way through and into every box, and packet be it cardboard or plastic… all with contents spread over the bottom shelves now…

It took me a while to clear, and I didn’t find anything that was eating its way but its one way to clear a cuboard – shame as now have to go get new stuff… Nevermind, glad its sorted and didn’t happen with company – that would be uncomfortable.

I don’t like to think what other creatures are around the house… I just accept there are things, and the less I know the better… then I don’t over think it.

“Ignorance is bliss, until you understand why!”

To dance and be so free

Posted on by JC

To dance and be so free – lost in the moment.

On saturday night I went to a place in town I’ve not been before called kilamanjo’s – they had a night of salsa and food. A friend from work invited anyone who wanted to go to it, only myself and them went.

I was told the wrong time – an hour of difference so I was early – it was meant to start at 8pm – I was told 7pm so was early arriving just after 7. Gave me time to write, and mix with people as they came in.

First time in around 3 months having alchol with a tasty wine. Fruity but not too steet – then again its a red so i dont think it should be too sweet. I only had 2 glasses of wine, otherwise it was softdrinks – its not good to have a lot of alchol then try dancing – especially when co-ordination is a major factor.

Salsa Dancing

Salsa Dancing

It was good to see people smiling, I wondered how I’d get on, knowing that it was going to be fun and it was – the food was good too – think i’ll go there again even if its not a salsa night.

I hoped to get lots of dancing done and have lots of fun. It was great fun and I was told I suprised people that I could do at least the basics… I went blank and couldn’t remember how to do things so just stuck with the very basics of moves but was still a lot of fun.

I got to speak with so many people… I was alone for a while so did the general intro of “hi, I don’t really know anyone here so thought i’d introduce myself and see how it goes..” the general reply was welcoming and we got on well.

I saw a few people i’d met from classes when I started there and caught up of whats been happening in life. It was good to see them as it meant I had different groups of people to mix with and wasn’t hanging around with those that invited me.

It was a good night, and headed home soon after midnight as was tired and most people had headed off. I had a good night, with new and old friends.

I need to work out how to use confidence, and remember what I can off the moves to use when dancing.. I think half of it is wondering what others think but when I do things its enjoyable. Try to stay posative, and remember everyone was a starter at one point.

Migrane(s) yet again

Posted on by JC

I get headaches, I’ve been to the hospital to see consultant and they’ve started me on some medication that I’ve not taken for the past 7 weeks slowly increasing to a full dose. I’ve to give it 6 weeks to get into my system. I hope it will stop the headaches and especially the migranes.

At the hospital they told me I seem to have a mixture of headaches – Migrane, and a daily style one that happens to co-inside with the migranes – really knocks you out in multiple ways – sight not in focus, pain, dizzyness and dis-orientation, queezy and generally just feeling not right.

Sometimes its like a sudden pulse and hits you strong, and then gone but usually it starts as a kind of nagging pain in the back of the head moving to focus just above eyes increasing in pain to the point where its difficult to do anything. Concentration does not really exist, hard to sleep, read, watch TV/PC – you just can’t do anything.

I have a hat/cap that I put on, its a set of gel pads that are chilled that covers the eyes and seems to hit points on the head that calms the pain down a little… just enough to get to sleep – its also great if wearing contacts too long, as cools the eyes and refreshed them.

Anyhow I hope that it fixes the problem the medications – I;m not meant to drink alchol with them, but according to the NHS website it says not in first 4 weeks as can amplify effects.

First night I took first meds it made me sleepy within 45 minutes and I slept really well, after 3 days it didn’t make me sleepy but the dose went up after 2 weeks to 2.5x the original dose, and full dose was 5 times original. I don’t get sleepy quickly off them but do seem to rest well each night.

A quick change from 2am bed times to 11pm, and now normally between 12:30 and 1am… which seems a good time.

Seeing friends – meeting new people

Posted on by JC

Over the weekend i’ve met up with a friend that I’ve known a while and we decided to go into county durham and meet some of her friends. Went for a meal and to the pub quiz – which we didn’t do too bad in, which was a suprise – think its the first quiz I actually knew several answers to questions instead of one or none.

I met her friends and it was like instant relaxation and getting one with one another – thats not happened in a long time. I’ve not litterally met with people and got on right away with what was no less than hi, my name is… quick intro and head on out. It was really good.

I was glad to see her and meet more people. I often get to meet a lot of people and know a lot of people from all different things. I find it good to know people or at least start to get to know people. Its been good.

I think that I write more when I feel happy. A more eveness in the world. Not that I’ve been feeling down or anything just not especially happy either. Inspiration from happyness. I guess its more that I like to try and make people happier and its easier when your feeling in happy.

I’ve found when I see friends often I am a lot happier. 🙂

Just an Update

Posted on by JC

Recently I’ve felt odd, that there is more that I can do but not feel that I can at the same time. Today has been good. I’ve been feeling a change and more posative. I’ve not written here in quite a while.

It’s not that I don’t have anything to say, more so that I don’t know how to explain everything that I want too and I seem to be most inspired to write while I should be asleep. Often I dream that I have written it down and then find its not there and have to re-remember it again.

Lord of the Dance

Posted on by JC

Its good to remember what you miss sometimes… For you can go and often try it again. Remembering what is lost and what could be found again.

Lord of the Dance

Lord of the Dance

On friday night I went to sunderland empire theatre with a friend, we went to see Lord of The Dance. It was a good show with Good seats, and company.

Lots of dancing, a little singing and a lot of music – I would recommend seeing it – it was great. I really enjoyed it, althou still not sure what the story was if there was one.

I’ve always loved dance – the expression of self in relation to music and sounds. To flow or just move and enjoy. I miss it – not been in a while, one reason was headaches (Hard to concentrate on a beat, when there’s a pulsing extra beat in your head), another is money (Costs to go to classes), and time – I seem to fill it doing just stuff or work.

I look forward to getting back to it. I’m unlikely to ever be fit enough as a dancer is but I will enjoy the time, and hopefully get better at it.

Harvest – Psycological Re-boot

Posted on by JC

I went away to harvest this year calm and knowing that this year was just like most years. I steward, chat and chill with people. I seem to meet people more on a personal level now than just those I work with… Think its got to do with the amount of time we’ve worked things together.

I went there trying new things like the ministry team – to try and stretch me.

I also went there open to what God can do in my life. How I can do things differently but also took a back seat to volunteering myself into more things. I did the ministry team when i could but also saw myself as in a settling place – somewhere I fitted in but didn’t too..

So much changed and to talk with others there again also feeling the same change, and they’ve only done it a fraction of the time there. I think Harvest is now a past rather than present thing for me and a few others.

I left harvest feeling some decisions in life were actually happening. I saw people on teams that haven’t worked well before work amazingly well together and support one another when it actually mattered.

I felt a part of the many things that were holding me back just gone. I can’t explain what was holding me back but the weight was not there so much – I felt so much more relaxed and more like me again. A side effect means people see a lot more sarcasm but thats just who I am.

It felt great – a friend said it was like a psycological reset – I had returned to an earlier happier person again and it is good to see me again.

Harvest – My Beginning Time

Posted on by JC

I’ve gone to harvest since 1994, on and off for the first few years. Since 2000, I’ve helped on the stewarding teams with a variety of people now.

The first year I attended, the topic for the week was “Everybody needs somebody”. This seemed to hit home really strongly.

I was part of a church youth group, I got on with a few people but not many, and I wasn’t close to any inparticular. I knew of Christianity and believed in it althou still with many questions. I was a mid-teenager with a lot of questions in life. I still do now but then it was really confusing.

I went there with the feeling of knowing no-one. I wanted to go to things no-one else in the group wanted too and so instead I went out and mixed. I spoke to people, people that if I was at school I would be too scared to try – but all these people didn’t know me and if they complained I’d just go elsewhere.

I will always remember meeting a few other people there – some of which I made great friends with, some I never saw again. One person seemed troubled and talked to me. I didn’t feel alone, but felt comfortable trying to help another.

We went for a walk one night, I didn’t realise i was meant to tell my youth leaders… we wandered and talked for a while and found ourselves at the enterance road and headed round in a loop. We didn’t get back til after 11pm and my youth leader was not pleased probably to say the least.

The event had a lot of loud, fast, rythmic music that was fun to sing, and join in with. We prayed, talked, were spoken too and in some times felt so much inside that it was hard to explain.

There was games on a saturday: Football, Rounders and Its a Knock out.

Its a Knock out – probably totally against Health &  Safety laws of nowadays but so much fun. Four coloured villages playing against one another in a variety of crazy games. Nothing really won apart from the Joy of beating the others.

I remember things on Sale such as a T-Shirt with the branding of Harvest, and the topic for the year and the year. Something to remember it all by except well… memories.

Helpful Days of Chatful Joy

Posted on by JC

Today has been a good day for me. I’m getting back my ability to write again as there has been no updates for well over a month or so and yet so much has happened. Today I will just speak of today but I have so much more to say now.

I got lost trying to find a friends hometown some 30 minutes from my own. Found the friend late and had coffee and chat – heard a little of their life of the past few months and shared a little of mine.

Today was a time to share and learn about friends experiences over the past few months. I met with 2 friends and had an interesting conversation with another on the phone never mind the multiple chats online aswell telling me of engagements and changes in life for them – its quite exciting the future for so many I am close too.

Tyre Changing

After seeing one friend and chatting I wandered for a while before heading over to my hometown. I was meeting another friend for Coffee – I had a hot chocoalte later on but that wasn’t until after shopping with her – and her asking lots of questions about clothing and shoes I didn’t really have answers for – most things looked the same to me.

Before meeting up, I had some time to use up so headed towards the library in stockton after parking up and as I was walking I noticed an old guy attempting to change a flat tyre – he looked troubled – I walked past and stopped, thought and returned. I asked if I could help in any way – I didn’t really know how I could but just wondered if I could.

I helped the guy change his tyre – he seemed very grateful for the help as couldn’t get things working – we changed it together and chatted a little. Took around 20 minutes to do it and I just said to him at the end “Glad I could help” with a smile, and went on my way – only to go to the library to clean my hands from the oil of the wheel.

As I was finishing I Noticed he had disabled sticker in his car too, and may have had more difficulty. It was odd to see so many people (including police) just walk by and not offer any help.

We seem to live in this world where we expect everything to be done for you but not to actually step out and help or to be paid for something – I guess I was paid in joy of helping cos it felt good to do so.

So, so far I’m having an amazing day… but before I went back to help I asked God “should I?” and then went for it. Its not something i’d often do but maybe we should take more time out and look at what is happening in life around us and see what 20 mins time out to help can do for another… I now wonder what else we as a people or a church can do so simply.

I like the way my life is evolving, and the understanding of simple tasks can make such a difference. I look forward to the time where I will have another like you have, but am quite excited on what I can now do on my own.