Diary – The blog area

Standing for council

Posted on by JC

A mixture in with recent topics really… polotics… People I know have gone for MP and in Early May they got their position. Next year I will be standing for somewhere – wrote up some of my application forms to be sent in – they took a while. I don’t know where I’ll be standing but would think I would have a good chance to get it.

I’ve always just accepted that you should always help people, and helped with calls and re-directing things for years as you should. My plan – Help people if you can and do what you can, and keep people updated even if it seems nothing is happening – keep people informed and usually its helpful to the person who reported it. Simple – but quite effective – to see something happening and not just nothing then a result.. Its good to see progress.

So, I will be standing in the council next time there is local elections which I think is next year some time. Planning is already in progress. At present we are working on a website for myself and all of the others in the party in this area… Its growing slowly and should have something on it in the next few months or so. I like the idea of keeping people informed as I’ve always wanted to be informed… and since community sites are all the way at the moment – we may aswell take advantage of them while we know how to use them.

Lost contact, changed contact…

Posted on by JC

I, like many others try to keep in contact with people. I now seem to have many many contacts from all different aspecs of life including University, Trampolining, Spring Harvest, Church, IXth hour, close friends, polotics, aswell as family and others. I’ve not really kept in contact with people recently… its hard to find the time if I am going to get work done as well.

I find it quite difficult to keep up with all thats going on, facebook seems a nice idea to see a glimpse of whats happening and what people are up too and gives a point, reminder to some of the stuff to further ask questions about but also maybe shares a little too much details some times.

Recently I’ve cleared my contacts list from around 450+ to around 270 ish and still thats a lot of people. I got to thinking about all those people I had on there and If I was to meet them, would I stop and chat or just maybe smile and carry on. Many of the contacts were from school times, and even then I wouldn’t have really chatted with them – or called them a friend, so why keep them on the list. Initially I had many to be nosey – to see how people have changed since then and for many I’ve re-made good connections, and still making some connections now.

Blogs and stuff. Do you have one? I know I’m writing mine now. Its a place to express what I’m thinking or going through – to try and explain a bit about where I am coming from in life and share openly and easily. Leave me a message – tell me your link.

Many friends have blogs I’m aware of, but I’ve not really read any since March this year – I just stopped. There seemed so much happening that I didn’t have time to stop and read… and now to start from where I finished will take a while but i’ll catch up again.

I had not really updated mine for several months, althou still have loads to say. Having so many words, and images in my mind about all that is happening and that I can get involved with. Its an explosive time with the masses of information being processed… its all mixed up but still I want to share – be it via chat, text, email or something else – to express myself in a way thats just me.

Recently I’ve changed my phone plan – I get unlimited texts and around 100 minutes – I don’t think I’ve ever used all my minutes up that I get free with my phone, however have previously gone over on texts – hopefully that won’t happen anymore. Landline calls – I get them all free or at least included in the plan I’m on. Skype – that allows free calls too (of sorts) – Chatting on phone – something I’ve never really gotten on well with, but maybe something to try a bit more.

Friday Night Out :) Good Time.

Posted on by JC

On friday night I went to a friend from works engagement party and had a really good time. When ever I’ve been out at a work related night I’ve never drank – usually as I needed to drive home afterwards and thats never a mix I want to do. This night was different, Got dropped off and a taxi back later on – was a good plan and worked well.

I have a variety of drinks, usually either malibu or bacardi mixed with pepsi – not as great as coke cola but still worked well. I chose not to mix anything else and was thankful I didn’t. It was an enjoyable night, and was glad to be with friends.

After the engagement party, we headed into middlesbrough to one place that was quite crowded on linthorpe road. I enjoyed the music, but had stopped drinking – I know my general limits between having a good night, and having a good followed by bad night – seems I learned something else from uni after all.

We headed over to what used to be known as the purple onion in middlesbrough after about 30 minutes, and mixed in a wierd set of music – or at least wierd to me – it seemed as thou you had to be high on something more than alchol to “appreciate” the atmostphere – and a lot of people looked like they were on something. We had to pay £5 to get in – It was nice to see people, but we didn’t stay long.

The energy in the place just felt wrong, as thou we and everyone else was being sucked down a drain hole. Spiriling down into something out of place. Many were just going with the flow – others felt it very odd there too but I don’t think they saw it the same as I did.

A small group of us headed back to the other place, and enjoyed the rest of the night there. It was a lot less crowded now – I think many had moved on elsewhere after we had left. We enjoyed the rest of the night, Chatting, Dancing, Taking some really random photos, and some continued drinking althou according to facebook, seems that might have been a bad choice (hangovers).

The end of the night consisted of drinks being sold to some of the group, and then before them leaving the bar – the “security team” trying to throw people out immediatly. I think there is something in law saying that they have to give 20 mins or more drink up time after sales but never actually read that anywhere – just heard it in hearsay. However to sell a product that is unusable could probably be counted as an illegal sale or at least refundable as you were unable to use it but I’m not too sure.

We all got taxi’s home, and rested – some on Saturday were reporting on facebook that “they’ll never drink again” – maybe its just better to know when to stop… a semi-simple approach of when your drink is finished, wait 10 to 20 mins before getting another or having a swap: alchol then soft drink can work quite well too. All in all, a great time out and I’m glad that I chose to go.

Harvest

Posted on by JC

Harvest is an event in the North East of England originally based at witton castle in county durham, but now based in Teesside. It is for young people to connect together for around a week, and get to know God in a different way.

I started to go to harvest in 1994, I was around 14 to 15 years old and went with the church I was with at the time called The Tab – I made so many new friends while I was there, and learned how worship could really be expressed by youth and not just hyms in church but actual music you could enjoy singing and dancing too. There was many games, seminars, and workshops of sorts – be it learning, how to put into action or having fun.

There used to be a game – a challenge between the villages of harvest. People were split into 4 colours of village depending on the area you came from in the North East.

The challenge was its a knock out – they played it each year until around 1998 and it has never been seen before. Basics of it was silly games that involved a lot of water – knockout with sticks with foam on ends pushing one another trying to make the other person fall or bobbing for items in buckets aswell as physical challenges but all in the idea of fun. I enjoyed it a lot.

I went to harvest as a participant til around 1999 (aged 19/20 ish) after which I joined the stewarding team. I initially joined because many of my friends were already part of the team, and we were hanging out already. When I started stewarding you still paid to go, a few years in they stopped charging staff and it was kind of just accepted. From this year, they’re asking people to put something towards costs which is understandable but they seem to be getting a lot less people volunteering now.

9 years of helping out stewarding – I’ve seen many ideas on how to work it, how to help and what has or has not worked. People do seem to be repeating past things and don’t often believe its been done before – or not done as the circumstance often is. This year, 2010 I am not doing the stewarding at harvest, I’ve enjoyed my time there but its time to move on like so many friends already have.

Last year (2009) I was on stewarding team primarily, and ministry team secondary – I learned a lot, or so it felt so. People suprised me and opened up and it was good. It is time for me to do something different.

I am not sure what this year I will be doing at harvest if anything, I’d like to go and see how it is without being on the staff side althou I am not sure that is even possable. I think I will apply to be on the ministry team once again so I can help out, but also enjoy the site and see things before ending.

I feel it may be my last year helping out there, and this saddens me as it is an event that has helped me for a long time, over half my Christian life, and about half my actual life. Its helped me meet with many like minded people and has been very enjoyable but just as last year was my last year to steward, this may be the last to help before I am just a visitor.

All in all, Harvest has been amazing for me – so many new friendships and many ups and downs. Enjoyment from wandering, talking, playing, and listening. Its been a good time in life that I am glad I’ve had the oportunity to have.

Some people I made friends with in 1996, I was working with on team in 2005ish – we all said to one another – I know you, but I don’t know how? From photos I found later in the year, I discovered we’d all hung out together as one random group in a tent for a few days one harvest – some 10 years ish earlier but had lost contact – well before internet and email was the norm.

Missing @springharvest Already #SH2010

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I sit around here just stopped wasting time by watching entertainment on TV – time that over the past week I’ve not even missed having a TV around. Its been Amazing, Sad, Joyful and more but so much was done in the time that was there and so many new friends made there aswell.

The daily laughter and joy, the glorious weather that seems to still be here today and all that we were blessed with. There was a Lot of work to do almost all the time, but it was worth it. Felt so much, learned new things, made friends, re-connected with a lot and remembered where a joy came from I lost so long ago.

For the past week I’ve been helping steward at Spring Harvest in skegness week one. It has been an awesome week with great people coming from all walks of life together to help people as one group. A mixture of IT, Actors, Students, Builders, Teachers, doctors and more – all working together as one body.

When something went wrong, people fell in place to fill the gaps – it was brilliant. We were all tired, somewhat exhausted, by mid to end of week but the joys, the happyness around surrounded us all.

I missed it as soon as I was driving back – so quiet – nice for a bit but no laughter, just a long drive back to the northeast.

Today has felt missing, although I rested well – A whole 6 hours longer than most of the week. No huge breakfast or lunch surrounded with friends, just back to normal – not sure I like normal anymore. Wondering what I’ve learned and what is still to come.

For the first time in a long time, I am looking forward to church and actually want to get more involved again – I’ve stood back for a while, to watch how everything goes but I dont want to watch anymore, I want an active part – some way to help and keep things going.

I hope I never forget my week, and sure I’ll be friends with many for a long time yet – The team worked – like a body of Christ in litteral meaning – we came, worked different parts and together helped.

I do not want to return to meaningless life – filling it up with technology to pass the time. It is a great connector of the world, and will help keeping connections with new friends but it also gets in the way. I hope thats not the way in the future.

Chilled Night Out

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Chilled Night Out

The night was cold, snow and icey around and under – Refreshing change, chilling but fun. The moon was bright and full and making the snow and ice shine as we walked though it all.

I went to a friends 20th on last night (Saturday), drank lots of sweet drinks and cocktails – Felt secure, and safe and very happy. Got to know some I knew by faces only better on the night – it was fun.

It ended so early, met around 8.30pm to 9pm and people left before midnight. Everyone but me had gone by midnight – it felt so early as thou we were just starting but they had things they had to be up for in the morning for work or other things so headed off early.

I couldn’t go yet, I felt an urge to do … something, anything that didn’t involve heading strait to be – not sure I could have anyway with the amount of sugar I had drank – Merry is close to where I got, but was expecting to be out after 2 am so paced the drinks.

I wandered, alone watching the world around me. Noticed a HUGE wheel in middlesbrough where I think before there was a big bottle – maybe it just hides the bottle.

I wandered and went where I felt directed… In the end it was a giant square. I saw so much – so many “drunken” people – it didn’t look like they were having a great time. A LOT of police everywhere – especially on corners. I’ve not really been out in middlesbrough in a long time. I did on my 30th for a little while but not really gone out out… if that makes sense.

I enjoy dancing, and if I was aware that we were just going to be out pre-midnight, i’d have maybe organised to go to the salsa thing in stockton afterwards however didn’t go in the end. Got a taxi home around 1am – about an hour of wandering.

Apparently there was many from work out tonight – i didn’t see them, but was suprised at the sheer amount of people out – only realising its end of month at the end of the night which explains it a bit. Everyone Paid – so out to party.

I enjoyed the night but wanted it to be much longer. Do I appreciate it more as it was short? I dunno as it was so short.

Plans for sunday: Read more of “The colour of Magic” and meet with another friend. Really enjoying reading, althou it does take me quite a while.

Happy now…

Posted on by JC

I have a joy inside me that i’ve really no idea where its really coming from, maybe its me looking forward to tonight – seeing so many friends and enjoying a night out celebrating a birthday – Probably that.

But i’ve heard things that have given me a buzz. As I’ve said before I do love looking at the moon and this morning / tonight there is a full one in the sky. I think its got a lot to do with the many great memories I’ve got associated with nights where I’ve seen it. A commonality between episodes.

Went to bed last night around 2am, and saw the moon nicely in the sky over the very heavy looking clouds… Woke this morning to clear blue sky and a white covering all over wherever was green – quite a change but still kinda exciting.

Anyhow… Going for a walk and when back getting ready to go out. For now, I just feel really happy – So i’m sticking with it. Quite different to my last post.

Not so great…

Posted on by JC

This afternoon I’ve not felt too brilliant. I was very tired and felt slugish, no mental or body energy for a while so laid down and went to sleep.

I remember dreaming but it wasn’t nice. Over the past few nights it hasn’t been too nice. There seems to be a negative feeling over them all.

From being hurt in some way and feeing the pains while awakening before realising I’m awake and it passing to the feelings that something was trying to get rid of me. I don’t know why but I don’t like it.

I feel very hot, and can not seem to cool down quickly then suddenly the oposite – really cold unable to warm up. Is it normal? I usually dream nice things, or only seem to remember the nice things anyway. This side I don’t like…

I want to return to my adventures but maybe there is something I need to do – But I need to remember what that something is or to work it out, I hope I work it out soon.

No Particular Title

Posted on by JC

Its been a while again since i’ve really spoken out on here. Although I enjoy the ability it gives me to share whats happening in life and general thoughts, I really don’t share all that I feel. I doubt I ever will at least in the online world.

I have been out dancing salsa – i never realised how much I appologise when I get things wrong until my partner said something and I actually heard myself saying sorry. It’s not that it was particually wrong or right, just not as I saw it should be and for some reason I say “I’m Sorry” or just “Sorry”.

I didn’t go dancing for a long time, and I really missed it – it is something that excites and scares me at the same time. Unfortuantly it seems to show the fear in my face – have to work out how to hide that again.

Is it good that my feelings are finally showing through me instead of just holding it all back. Maybe its something in the freedoms of dance that allows it to shine through… and I’m sure over time that it won’t be fear showing but joy.

It really does make me happy and give me a kind of High feeling… happyness with a great big smile and an energy that I must do something more.

I’ve signed up back at the Arc in Stockton for some of the classes in the Salsa Improvers class. Its quite a bit different to other classes – seems much more of a show and practice and personal tuition at the moment – there isn’t many that go there yet so I’m getting good practice. I feel I’ve learned much in the first session and it was only an hour long. I’ll probably go earlier next week and go to the beginners class aswell.

I had some real good encouragement, exactly when I needed it and am thankful for it. I’m getting more active in life in general and feeling a lot better for it aswell.

Anyhow, I’ll leave it for tonight. I just had so much to express after class. So for a change I’ve updated people instead of sitting back and just watching a movie or something.

A Year Day By #Day @orange_penguins

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Another blog… except daily with pictures: http://ojm365.wordpress.com

The plan is to take a picture of something in that day, and write some thoughts on whats happened or something like that. So far its been kept up to date.

Day 1: End of 2009
Day 2: Beggining 2010
Day 3: Read left or right its the same date in the US
Day 4: End of new years break
Day 5: Back to work
Day 6: Semi fake milk
Day 7: The sixth day

So one week down so far, 51 or so to go.